Saturday, June 28, 2008

May She Rest In Peace

Catharine Bluhm
September 27 1940 - June 28 2002

I love you, Grandmom.

Saturday, June 21, 2008


I feel much more like myself than I have all year. This is an incredibly random post.

So one day, I was talking to God and I was like, "Hey, why couldn't you have given us an off switch on our brains?" (It had been a bad day and I was thinking about things that were confusing and hard) Anywho, He said "Well, Catherine, you know... the way that you find me is through those thoughts. If I gave you an off switch and you could turn them off, you would be less likely to find me. You'd be able to turn me off." And I said, "oh, well... that makes sense" and He said "Did you expect me to do something that didn't make sense?" and I siad "well, no. I just don't expect to be able to make sense about what makes sense to you." and He said "Well... don't get used to it."

But... I still sometimes wish I could have one. Although, I suppose that it would just provoke the whole "run" thing that I have going.

So tonight and last night, since my mother and father are not here, I have been the one expected to take of meals. I LOVE IT! Like, seriously, not just meals, but since RC works like my dad and is hardly ever home anymore but is home this week, Christina has been... well... a little preoccupied. Plus today, they had to go to Montgomery to talk with Father and do all that stuff. SO... I have had to you know, do everything. Keep the brothers happy; make sure they don't do something dangerous, make sure they don't kill each other, keep them busy because otherwise they get sad because they miss Dad and now mom, too and mom gets to see Dad but they can't, feed them and make sure they eat well, and make sure they do their chores and all that kind of stuff. Part of it I don't like. The part that has to say "no you can't do that" or "no you cannot eat chocolate for lunch" (because seriously, who [unless you are like me and don't actually like chocolate] doesn't want that for lunch - especially when you are five and miss your parents). But... there's nothing better than to hear than "Thank you! You made it for me??! I've been wanting to eat that for like, a month!" (Now, I have no idea if the time frame is accurate, but that's completely irrelevant.) I mean, the gratitude of a hungry eleven year old boy when you fix his favorite food... you really can't get much more gratitude than that. (Not that I do it for the gratitude, I do it cuz well... let's be honest... I have to but also a little because it's fun to see them so happy. But I don't know, there's something about planning well balanced meals and making sure that they eat well balanced meals (whether it is... you know, exactly what you had in mind or not) and such that makes me not be able to wait until maybe one day I have a family of my own to do that for. My favorite book:
Home Comforts: The Art and Science of Keeping House . Eh, I'm a weirdo. But I can cook and clean! And my boys love me! And really who cares about anything else.

Pringles has this flavor of chip called Baked potatoe. I am not sure what I think of this. it really does taste like a baked potato. It an odd sensation for one's taste buds. Kind of like cheeseburger pizza (have you ever had that? strange strange stuff, it is). It makes me wonder what is in them. I mean, they are good. But are they toxic? Cuz, seriously, how can they not be?

OH! OH! So... which one's worse: Being 18 (last January) and getting bifocals OR being 19 and correcting most vision problems with contacts BUT having to buy the (lowest strength) generic type of reading glasses? BIFOCALS. They are awful. Yeah, I can see. But my world is split in half! NOW... I can watch a movie! LOL. It was difficult with bifocals, but, I am so freakin' near sighted that I can't see the screen if I take my glasses off. Now... I am free!! I never ever thought I'd wear the things that you have to poke into your eye. But they are great. I wish I'd had them sooner. It's still a little strange taking them out. Putting them I'm ok. But taking them out kinda creeps me out. BUT I CANN SEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My sister (who is even more nearsighted than I - though she doesn't have focusing problems like I do yet)has a theory. Monet- great impressionist? No- just a blind dude painting what he saw. LOL.

Um... I think I should I go... I hear my boys singing the song about the ten in the bed and the little one said "roll over"... I should probably go SEND THEM TO SLEEP!

Wednesday, June 04, 2008

Psalm 121

Some soul comfort

Psalm 121
1I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help.

2My help cometh even from the LORD, who hath made heaven and earth.

3He will not suffer thy foot to be moved: and he that keepeth thee will not sleep.

4Behold, he that keepeth Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep.

5The LORD Himself is thy keeper: the LORD is thy defense upon thy right hand.

6So that the sun shall not burn thee by day, neither the moon by night.

7The LORD shall preserve thee from all evil: yea it is even He that shall keep thy soul.

8The LORD shall preserve thy going out and thy coming in from this time forth for evermore.